Thursday, April 1, 2010

On Umbrella Graveyards (The Boston vs. New York City Post)

[Originally posted on March 15th 2010]

Good evening my loyal lovelies, it has been a few days since we last spoke, so I have some serious words…

When last I left you, you were holed up (understandably) in your room/house/office ogling the latest video by the ever formidable Gaga, probably on repeat. I know I was, but that was for research. Obviously. And as brilliantly fascinating as she is, I have some other thoughts for this particular post, so tear yourselves away for a moment and come grab a comfy seat around me, your Boy at Sea, while I share. And don’t fret, I’m sure I’ll return to Gaga sometime soon.

So onto business you Queers! A couple of house-keeping notes that were brought to my attention this past weekend:

1. I was told by you, all of my fabulous followers, that I swear in my posts. A lot. Perhaps even an obscene amount. To that I say: thank you for your concern, I take into deep consideration that you may think my posts would be stronger without all of the four-letter words. Well, cheers, and fuck off. The language is going to stay, I only put it where the emphasis is needed (I emphasize a lot) and I think it adds. I’m an adder. And, well folks, nautical print is in this season and I swear like a sailor.

1.a. I was also told that if I was going to be saying “mother fucking” and was going to use the abbreviated version that I should stop spelling it “motha” and start spelling it “mutha”. Noted. The change will be made.

Now that that is all taken care of, onward!

This weekend I went to NYC with B and C for a whirlwind adventure of art, food, family, dancing, and of course magic rum. As I mentioned previously, the last time I was in NYC I was 18, straight, a female, and had never left the woods. Obviously things have changed and I was excited to compare and contrast the scene that is New York City with my own dear New England Kingdom that is Boston.

What I found myself noticing mostly was the fashion. I was very intrigued to see how the styles were different between two such monumental cities that are not all that far away from one another. After thinking long and hard about it, doing some serious analyzing, and discussing with my comrades it was decided that while both cities have adapted the phenomena that is “hipster” Boston’s version has a slightly more clean-cut business attire feel, while NY leans toward an edgier grungier feel. [It should be noted here that my sampling is just a study of the ages that probably range from 19-30] So, it seems to me that Boston maintains its old classy texture that is rooted in its history, its segregation, its charm, and its academic merging of diversity. New York (and I can only say so much because I honestly don’t know it that well) has such an enormous population compared to Boston’s and one that is so hugely diverse that its trendy-folk can make bold striking statements and they are well received if they are noticed at all.

While I am certainly attracted to the styles that women are rocking on the city streets these days, in both New York and Boston my eye is always drawn to the well-dressed man. In both of these cities he is put together and graceful, words like debonair, suave, and chivalrous come to mind when watching him. And these classy men (cis, trans, queer, and butch alike) are, in a way, bringing back the very old school feel of the 19th and 20th centuries, in my opinion. And I could not be happier. It is a wonderful clean, tight, svelte look that has new hip and daring additions. Get excited with me readers! This is a ballsy time for fashion and I can only hope that I can try and look that good. But I think if Boston was going to take a tip from New York it would be: bold and traffic-stopping is always better.

Well, my favorite ladies, gents, and gender-fucks, you’ve humored me long enough, letting me prattle on about the good, the bad, and the fashionable. So I will make a final note before I depart and let you all return to Lady Gaga wrapped in caution tape in a jail cell (hold the phone, doesn’t that sound like a college night folks?? You know of which I speak)…

As to the title of this post: Umbrella Graveyard. As we all know I do not fancy umbrellas and this weekend just went ahead and proved me right. Umbrellas are great when it’s raining, on a WINDLESS day, but umbrellas DO NOT belong in New England. Because it never just rains, it is also freaking windy as fuck and then you know what you have: sideways rain, people. You have fucking sideways rain and spindly little legs of metal wrapped in fabric. So accept the fact that the East Coast has the most bat-shit crazy weather ever, put the umbrella down, and find a more fashionable way to keep those lovely little faces dry.

Good night all, sweet dreams of drier days…

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